This one's an oldie but a goodie:

it's time for another installment of "Justin's weird dreams"

So it starts off, I'm Jennifer Connelly. I've got very high anxiety and I'm convinced alien monsters are after me. Then this alien ship shows up from behind a hill... but in an M. Night Shalyman twist, like it actually was one, turns out the ship is flown by a dude wearing a monster costume, who's mischievously manipulating Jennifer Connelly/me in this bizarre behavioural experiment... except it goes horribly wrong.... Jennifer Connelly snaps and takes out a rocket launcher and launches a missile for biological warfare at the ship, with green smoke trailing out of it. The ship explodes, the guy inside dies, and suddenly this deadly green mist starts spreading, killing people. This is when I become Jennifer Connelly and suddenly I'm horrified and guilt-stricken by what I've done. Like I've committed the most horrific act of all time. So I run, part in shame and part in fear of the deadly gas! I continue running till I find this road... I hitchhike with a midget and a guy with no legs on a really really small golf-cart thing. Like it's the size of step stool. I become really good friends with them as I try to start a new life and leave the crap behind. So we're at an amusement park, and I'm on a roller coaster. But the roller coaster stops. Seems like the feds have caught up with me! For a moment I contemplate jumping out of the roller coaster and killing myself instead of getting caught (cuz apparently what I did was the worse thing possible), but my midget friends convinces me not too. So the feds take me and bring me to their lockup. They tell me that they're going to put a tracking device in my tooth, a plastic chip in my arm, and take a muscle sample from my neck for DNA, all of which they say is quite painful. So I'm terribly scared of what's going to happen to me in their prison. They let me talk to a few friends, and I'm chatting with Dan Worth and Matt Ninomiya on a couch, and I say I'm thinking of trying to escape, but they tell me it's not worth it; the feds would hunt me down for the rest of my life like a dog. So I think of the solution: I travel back in time to before I shoot the ship, and I blow the me from the past up with a rocket launcher, and I take his place in the timestream. Fast forward to the 'present' and my friends ask me what if the feds find out you've gone to the past. But then, thinking I'm so clever, I tell them, why would they chase me for something I never let myself do? And they go, ahhhhhh. And then I woke up

Last night, in a sweltering stupor, I dreamt that I was on the Canadian Olympic Hockey team. We were playing the Russians in a huge monolithic arena that was all black marble from the outside. It was a physical game, the score was 3-1 for us, and we had a lot of traffic in front of the net, there was a shot from the point, the goalie saved it and it sort of bounced around in the crease. I was behind the net and swung my stick with one hand out and around and somehow defied the laws of physics as my stick tapped the puck into the net towards me. Never mind my odd position but it was a sweet goal, what a great feeling scoring a goal for Canada :) After the game Martin St Louis came up and 'Nice goal man'.

This dream was the natural progression of my hockey dreams, maybe even continuity, considering the following Vaughn quote quoting me:
from Jan. 16: Justin: "the other day i dreamt i was on the canadian hockey team and i overcame the odds and racism that was thrown at me to become the first chinese nhler"

So Vaughn's convinced me to start this dream blog thing. I think he's just bitter that he lost Nudge Wars 2006. I welcome any/all interpretations :)

So I had this dream about a week ago: I'm watching a play competition, except no one in the play knows their lines. So they keep asking other actors on stage, "Hey man you know what my line is?" Or they're making comments on other actors' lines, like, "Oh I love that line", "Haha that's hilarious, one of my faves". It's terrible. So finally one guy in the audience has had enough and stands up and yells "WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LEARN YOUR LINES???" The actors on stage are quite genuinely surprised by his reaction and are like, "How do you suggest we do that?" So this audience member is suggests they read the script, except he has a SPECIAL script printed on electronic paper that automatically highlights the relevant lines in light blue... I guess like a teleprompter script.

So I've had enough, and I leave and go to the washroom, and then hey there's Leanne Hogeterp dressed ready to go to the beach, sun hat and all, waving at me and saying something to me. Except I don't notice her because I have Ipod earphones on and the music's too loud.

Plus I have to go meet up with Vaughn, who's taking me with him and a bunch of other people to 'Nambia'. Yes Vaughn, I'm aware that doesn't exist, but in the dream, you showed me a map and clearly printed were the words "Nambia". Of course this could open the debate as to whether one is able to read words in dreams, as that was the basis of a whole episode of Batman the Animated Series. I digress.

So I go to Nambia, but then I remember I have to go back to Oakville for a dental appointment. So I go back via the GO train, but I'm caught by these people and they bring me a big Roman-style building with marble pillars and the like. They sit me down on the opposite end of a really long marble table. On my side to my left and right are a whole bunch of other people like me. An old guy to my left whispers to me, hope you get a hot one. So then these white-robed individuals come out and sit opposite us. Mine happens to be a cute girl. The guy to my left softly curses. I start worrying though, because something seems odd. So finally, she asks me sternly, why were you in Nambia?? I struggle for an answer and finally say, To take photos and videos for your records. I know this is a bold faced lie. She suddenly gets really friendly and asks to see some photos. So I just happen to have some photos in my backpack of the Grand Canyon and I show them to her, and she gets really interested in the photos and starts asking all sorts of questions.

But then I'm kidnapped/rescued by my friend Vasu who takes me to Toronto. Except he won't let me out of the car, because he's just about to enter a drag race. So I'm forced to hold on as he tears down the streets of Toronto. Imagine the time lapse shot from City TV.

And then I woke up.

THE END

There's the most recent ones. I think I'm gonna have to post some of the crazy ones from the past that I can remember. Because they were so much weirder.